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Dear Pandora…

How aptly named you are, iphone app that has opened up a can of worms as well as a world of musical possibilities! I confess that I am now addicted to you, especially as I make long car trips. Where else can I build a radio station around James Brown? Where else can I mix K.C. and the Sunshine Band with the Black-Eyed Peas?

That said, there are a few things we must discuss, Pandora. I really don’t want Celine Dion and Peabo Bryson’s “Beauty and the Beast” mixed in with my Britney Spears. I know she once worked for Disney, but those days are long gone.

Also, when I say that I like a Ludacris song, please don’t load me down with rap. Unfortunately, there are tender ears in the backseat who don’t need to hear “You’re now turned into the m$#@-f%$$#@ greatest.” We all need to get a little dirt off our shoulders from time to time, but could you please consider radio edit?

Oh, and when I skip Gwen Stefani’s “Hollaback Girl,” it’s not because I don’t like her music. It’s because I don’t want my three-year-old running around saying, “This my s$#@!” (See plea for radio edits above.) You don’t have to send me to the Backstreet Boys. Please don’t send me to the Backstreet Boys.

And I’m sorry I blew your mind by pairing Sam & Dave with the Jackson 5 and the Beatles. I didn’t know that was going to blow your mind. And I sure didn’t know that the love child of those three acts was Stevie Wonder.

Finally, I thank you. I thank you for a radio station dedicated to crooners–although you can go light on the Mel Torme. I thank you for my radio station dedicated to Dr. John even if it does make me want to flee to Bourbon Street.

I know our relationship has already had a few ups and downs, but I can’t wait to see what you’re going to do with movie soundtracks or 50s music. I think this is love, Pandora. I think we’re in it for the long haul.

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